Perhaps, Perhaps, Perhaps.

So, I survived Finals.

Huzzahs all around.

It was a lot of work, I'm not going to lie, a lot of work. I probably could have done a little better than I did. But it was a lot at once. Ah well, it's over for now. After Finals, I was looking forward to the smooth sailing of the summer.

Oh, Matthew. How naïve you are! Life doesn't work like that. Have you not learned from life before? Perhaps you should take a class in history at Matt U.

Perhaps.

After finals I had tons and tons of grading to do. I also had a meeting I had to go to concerning my summer teaching at UF. I was still quite busy for some time, but it wasn't as stressful, which was good. I then went to the meeting and found out my original plans for the summer--which I had stressed about all semester in trying to get perfectly aligned and tried to let everyone know what was going on and not go behind people's backs--were now impossible. The teachers said they don't think it is a good idea and I had to choose between teaching the first half of the summer at UF or teaching the second half of the summer in Paris.

After a lot of debating and discussing with friends and my parents about what the best choice would be, I had not yet come to a decision. There were lots of things to consider: money, time, the ability of each program to replace me, what God might want me to do (if he even has a preference), etc. I was leaning on teaching at UF and then I got a call this morning though, from Paris, telling me that they really would like me to come to Paris and not teach at UF. The director in Paris also tried to talk to the head of the RomLang Dept and ask him to reconsider his decision. Perhaps he might change his mind.

Perhaps.

It turns out we all found a compromise that we could agree upon and I am now able to do both. This is very very good. It's also pretty awesome. I am excited.

So now, I am able to relax much more at home with my family and my friends. I'm going to see Michael, Kathryn, Nicole, & Drew tomorrow. It's going to be pretty sweet. I'm excited to see them. I'll get to see Becca on Friday and hang with Drew (from Gainesville) and Matt Stauffer when they come through too and show them Atlanta. It'll be pretty sweet. I'm excited.

Much less stressful now, which is good. I still have a kink in my back from my crappy chair I sat in way too much during finals week for typing the 50ish pages I wrote for school. But I'm hoping that goes away soon. There are a few things else on my mind, but a lot of them have been eased with the fact that a friend of mine helped me realize that just because you are being patient, does not mean you are not making a decision. Patience is an active decision, it's not laziness. It's something I will hopefully learn to handle well over the summer. That's my goal. God's not finished with me, yet, it seems. Perhaps I'll finally get it. Or, at least I'll be on my way.

Perhaps.

Perhaps, Perhaps, Perhaps.

So, after a frustrating end to yesterday, I'm back to feeling strangely calm. I still have a lot to do, but it seems like a more conquerable mountain. I am not sure how my grades will actually end up (hopefully all passing...what happened to being scared of not getting an A? When did 'C' become a goal?) but I am not worried.

I don't know how it works: I worry a lot, but I'm not really a worrier. I think the fact that I can't really continue to worry about something for a long time causes me to consistently re-worry about things. I don't know if that makes sense.

So here's the breakdown:

1. Tonight (Tuesday): Write take-home final exam (4 questions, not very hard looking) for Phonetics.
2. Wednesday: Last day of classes, turn in Final I wrote the night before.
3. Thursday: Lost & The Office (HECK YES!)...plus, maybe some writing of a 10-pg paper
4. Friday: Writing that 10-pg paper I said I was going to write the day before. Submit it online by midnight.
5. Saturday: Nothing but sleeping-in and hanging-out (and other present participles with hyphenated prepositions)
6. Sunday: Church, God-Time, Small-Group, Writing a 15-page paper
7. Monday: Turning in 15-page paper. Writing another 15 page paper
8. Tuesday: Continuing to write that 15 page paper....and procrastinating
9. Wednesday: 7h30 Final Exam for my students, then lots of grading, then turning in that last paper and I'm done.

So it seems like alot...and it is...but it'll all work out.

w00t.

Mid-term

This week has been a week of semi-productivity. I'm not completely neglecting anything, yet I'm not completely engulfed by a massive amount of responsibility. I'm just kinda gliding through this week. It feels kinda like Friday, but it's actually only Wednesday.

I'm enjoying teaching my students, as nearly always. I'm kinda ignoring the book a bit and focusing on just kinda teaching them. I think it is working out well. I even graded about 90% of their tests yesterday. Which is good because I already have 50 compositions I'm behind on grading. Oi. I'll get to them eventually. I had them do something very different for homework tonight. I hope it works out well and that they enjoy and learn from it.

I had a mid-term last week that I really bombed. D+. It's probably the lowest I've ever gotten on something in GradSchool...yet, I'm not as worried about this class as I was about my literature classes last semester. I am really not learning anything in this class...my interest is also way low because this class is not actually applicable to my future studies or my future career. The only motivation for this class is not failing...and that's a horrible motivation (albeit valid).

Sidenote: Albeit is a very cool word.

I have another mid-term tomorrow in another class (obviously), but I have no motivation to study for it. I'm not nearly as worried, but I really should look at some of this stuff. It's only 9PM. I have a few hours before I should go to bed. I have learned far more in this class than in the aforementioned one though.

My phonetics class doesn't have a midterm, but it's really cool. It's actually turned into physics and maths at this point, which--while I don't completely love maths--I am good at maths and can easily understand it. The physics of language is just cool.

Finally, I should probably find something to do for Spring Break. Maybe I can find a ridiculously cheap flight to somewhere or gather up some people for a road trip. Although, that will be hard for those friends of mine who don't have a spring break or not the same weekend. Ah well, we'll see, I suppose.

Apparently Five (or six...depending on how you want to look at it).

So I have gotten word about some of the stuff I'm going to be doing this summer.

I applied way back in the middle of January for teaching over the summer here at UF. I figure, I should probably find a job since I'm going to live here over the summer and I have 'real world' expenses. UF has two summer semesters, both about 7 weeks long. I was assigned to teach Summer B (July to Mid-August). I also applied two weeks ago for a position to teach French in Paris this summer. It would be held Mid-June to the end of July. I am still waiting to hear about that position this summer (hopefully sometime this next week). If I get in--which I hear from my 'secret sources' that I am up there as far as candidates go--then I'm going to hopefully try and switch teaching Summer B to Summer A (May to mid-June). Which means that my summer will be pretty full, but it will also be amazing. And I will have a steady flow of income and actually end up coming out slightly richer (which will be nice since I'm living pretty much paycheck to paycheck at this point...a little more financial security is always nice...for emergencies and such). Plus it will just be an awesome experience.

Anyway, other than that things are going relatively well in my life. I mean, I could complain (we could always find things to complain about) but I shouldn't complain. I've been really lucky and blessed over the past few months.

[Maybe I should tackle one of those things I said I would write about....ok, here goes]

As many of you know there are, in various languages, different ways to say "you". There is a familiar version (French: tu, Spanish: tú, etc.) and a formal version (French: vous, Spanish: vosotros/Usted, etc.) Because I speak French quite a lot throughout the day and I often find myself thinking in French and therefore praying in French, I wonder how I should address God. I mean, the almighty creater of the universe you would think should receive the upmost formality as possible--vous is the obvious choice. However, he is my father, my
Αββα, my אבא, so shouldn't I refer to him as tu? It's such a big deal in the French language and culture to use the right term and I think I just never knew which one. What if it applies in both ways?

Anyway, one day when I wasn't even thinking about it, I found myself on wikipedia (Quelle surprise!) and found out that many languages have two words for "you" including English. It turns out that English--back in the day--used to have a familiar and formal version of 'you'. I, honestly, had no idea.

It seems that back in the days of Thou and Thy these words were, in fact, the familiar versions of "you"; You and your were actually more formal. So when the King James version was being penned back in the ages of...well, King James, they realized that the all three, the Greek, Aramaic, and Hebrew referenced God in a very familiar way...not distanced at all from his people as a more formal tone would suggest. We think of the KJV having a very formal tone because Thee and Thou and Thine and Thy all seem very archaic and formal to us, but they are actually showing a more closeness with our God.

I dunno, I thought that was really interesting, so I thought I'd share.

Man, how many languages can I put in one entry? lol...

La vie d'un étudiant avancé...

I've finally got my schedule all fixed and I think, even though it will be fairly challenging, this semester will work out well. As a grad student you actually really don't have tests (life is a test enough). Instead, you have 15 page research paper in a foreign language at the end of your class and TONS of reading. I've got about 10 books to read and 10 films to watch this semester for classes. It should be interesting... I'm going to know so much (useless) information about French literature, cinema, and linguistics.

What am I doing? lol......

Literature, Television, and Java...

Mmm...French roast...

I had forgotten how much I enjoyed dark roasted coffee.

Also, I know people say that coffee makes you more alert, or whatever...but for some reason, caffeine seems to have the opposite effect on me and I end up wanting to take a nap. I'm not sleep deprived...I just want a nap after my three cups of coffee.

Teaching is going well. I'm enjoying it a lot. Their first test comes up on Friday. In a way I feel that it's not really just a test of their knowledge and understanding but also a test of my skills as a teacher and if they have learned anything from me this semester or not. I guess I'll find out this weekend while grading.

I've been watching a lot of random television on the internet. Northern Exposure is actually a cool show and makes me long for random conversations about physics and religion with Micah and Michael. It makes me want to live in a cabin in Washington or Montana (I think Alaska might be a bit much). Somewhere cool and green. I've also been watching a fair bit of this French TV show called "Un gars, une fille" (A guy, a girl)...it's basically short little snippets of this married couple's life together which are generally hilarious for various reasons.

I changed my schedule (again). After finding out that I had two intense literature classes requiring me to read fourteen novels this semester (that's one per week, on average) including handouts, and two research papers ON TOP OF my teaching and my other class on linguistics (the class that I actually find MORE interesting)...I couldn't do it. I'm not a literature person; I like reading, but required reading with analyses and in depth discussions on symbolism doesn't interest me. So I dropped one of them and am taking a class on cinema. Granted, it's a lot of work too, but it only has two books and I get to see some cool films. I guess I should get started reading Proust now....

New Things

This week begins the new school year at a new school with new teachers and new students in a new home in a new city in a new state.

Talk about a change. I've already had two days of orientation and there are three more days of orientation before school starts on Thursday. I've got my courses picked out and I sometime in the next few days I'll be told what my courses are that I will be teaching. I'm excited.

This year I'll be taking a required course for all TAs on how to teach a foreign language as well as a course called "Le sacré dans la littérature française" (The role of "the sacred" and religion in French literature) as well as one on the Structure of the French language. I might take Italian or Spanish or German or something as well...we'll see, depends on my schedule.

I haven't met too many people yet, but once school starts and the 50,000 students are back on campus I'm sure I'll be meeting tons of people all the time. My roommate seems ok, haven't really gotten to know him very well, but yeah, we'll see.

Stress, Stress, Stress!

---

So I have read and heard that the three most stressful times in a person's life are having a baby, buying a house, and planning a wedding. Now, I'm not experienced on those things very well but I can tell you that the second one--buying a house--is VERY stressful. There is just so much to think about and so much to know and so much to consider...and then once it's done, it's done. There's no turning back.

Oi.

Even though I was incredibly stressed and probably not very fun to be around while I was in Gainesville this past week, I did enjoy the town and the University, I think I'll enjoy it even better when I move down there in two months. The place I'm looking at has two bedrooms, two bathrooms, a balcony, kitchen, living room, it's on the second floor with no one above me and it's very close to the University. Now, the thing is, you can be very close to the University, but still be far from your classes. Most classes are in the the Northeast corner of the University and I'd be just across the street due south of the middle of the University....but whatever. It's still a nice place, if I can get there. If I don't I might rent out this place on the corner of 34th and W University across the street from the Law School and the UF Golf Course. I think that students get super cheap or free use of the UF Golf Course so I think Mike and I need to have a little golf game down there sometime. I think it'd be awesome.


Anyway, I should probably get back to work. Hopefully by the end of the week we will have this thing nailed out and I can be a little less stressed. Hopefully....

'Cause There's Just Too Many Scenarios To Analyze...

Today started out OK, I suppose.

I don't really know what happened.

Right now, however, I am feeling crappy.

I've been thinking far too much about where I'm going to live next year, how I'm going to survive living next year, why in the world a friend of mine from Berry thinks that Satan was the reason a group of us friends no longer hang out, how the crap this relationship with Maggie is going to work, how much it sucks being apart and how much that will be for the next year or so.

Gah, I'm done thinking. ever.

In other news I'll be thinking about housing all week as I will be leaving for Gainesville early tomorrow morning and coming back Sunday. Horray. :|

It seems it's always the crazy times...

Lake Coeur d'Alene, Idaho

---

I got my grades today for my last semester of my undergraduate career. It's pretty much incredible. I'm getting excited about graduating and moving on. I'm not sure it all has set in yet what that really means, but we'll see.

I never really realised how incredibly hard it is to find a good apartment/condo in a college town. I didn't think that there are going to be tons of places out there that are overcharging for what they offer and don't do upkeep because they know it's for college students that won't care. Hopefully it'll work out...things generally do. I've noticed that things are hard and difficult, but with some extra effort and some faith things seem to work out really well.

I also am apparently going to get a graduation present from Maggie today and another tomorrow. I'm very curious to see how this comes out since I have no idea what it is and she's being quite secretive.

A bientôt, Seattle; et bientôt Adieu...

---

So, in a week's time I will be where that picture is. It turns out that there is a very very very slim chance that I will be living in Seattle next year. In fact, probably about a 1% chance. It's super-slim. Instead I'll be living in Gainesville, Florida (the most likely candidate) or Urbana, Illinois (still a possibility). I'm still going to be visiting Jamie, Maggie, Meghan and a whole bunch of people in Cheney, Washington...and I get to visit Walla Walla...and the Prathers. Over all, next week should be awesome. I have a ton of work to get done with though in the next few weeks.

I've got six articles for a portfolio due on the 30th, an ELR due on the 2nd, the entirety of my portfolio due on the 9th, starting teaching again on the 9th, and my thesis has to fit in all the nooks and crannies that I can find between doing other things. I found out it only has to be at least nine pages now, which makes me feel better, because I was worried it was going to have to be 25. Nine is much more acceptable, in fact, I've only put about 1/6th of the information and it's already three pages. I just have to find time to put in the rest of it. I've got all of April to do that though, I should be ok. It's a lot of work.

Anyway, speaking of all that work. I'm off to go get started on it and eat some chicken and rice, I'm starving.